please weigh in!

So you all know how frustrated I've been. Now comes a question. Not a really huge question, but a worthy one nonetheless:
Am I being too patient? If so, with what? If not, what needs more?
Am I too much of a push-over? Why/why not?

Today I was 10 minutes late in texting J on my way out of work because I stayed 10 minutes late. As it turns out, a mistake I made cost the company $100,000. They didn't directly 'blame' me, but all the eye contact was uncomfortable. Anyway, so he calls me as the meeting adjourns, and asks if I'm mad at him. Not yet, so I say no. We talk a bit. I tell him that I want him to help me make money because we are drowning and I can't do it alone. He says, "I don't know what to say." I respond with, "I told you I need help with things that you're good at and you tell me you don't know what to say?" I tell him that I need him to do something that makes money. Anything. I started a cleaning business for him to work, and then he had surgery so now he can't. I asked him to do a work-from-home job, and he wont. He sleeps all day and watches youtube. Judge Judy no less. Sure, the dishes are done, sometimes he cooks,  he gets up and does community service on his feet 4 hours a day, and manages to sit up on the couch long enough to watch 15 episodes of whatever tv show is now airing on netflix or youtube. am i being impatient? I don't know if I'm over-reacting or under-reacting. Please weigh in and let me know what you would do!